Friday, May 27, 2011

Have you thought "I Could Never Give My Baby Away"?

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy, chances are that the thought "I could never give my baby away!" has crossed your mind. The truth is, adoption isn't giving your baby explores that myth.

Adoption is giving your baby a life, a stable family, and a future. No matter how far along you are, an unplanned pregnancy may make you feel like you are stuck. However, the truth is you always have options. The choices you make at this point will affect your child’s future, as well as your own. Today, women choosing adoption play an active role in every part of the adoption process. You are able to customize your own adoption plan. You can make choices every step of the way.

You are able to choose the adoptive parents for your baby from a wide variety of couples, and meet them if you’d like. You also have the option to exchange on-going letters, photos, and visits. Check out to learn more about open adoption.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Proposed Solution for Abortion Funding Cut

The U.S. House of Representatives voted Wednesday to ban federal funding of abortions. While Republicans are cheering their leadership in passing the bill that is supported by current public opinion, the Democrats and the White House are portraying this as evidence of an extreme social agenda, limiting women’s rights to reproductive health.

Lost in the midst of the arguments between choosing life and choosing abortion is the often-forgotten third choice of adoption.

Adoption provides a woman with the right to choose not to parent a child she is not ready to. It provides an opportunity for infertile couples who may not otherwise ever have the ability to become parents of a baby. And most importantly, it provides a clear possibility of a life filled with choices for the child, apart from the moral debate on abortion.

“It is disheartening that adoption is lost in the whole pro-choice and pro-life debate. Especially when it is a choice that can provide everyone involved with a positive outcome,” says Mardie Caldwell, C.O.A.P., author of So I Was Thinking About Adoption, a book geared toward women facing an unplanned pregnancy. “I still speak to teens today who have never heard about the choices they have with open adoption. It’s amazing that they are aware of all types of birth control, morning after pills, and sexually transmitted diseases but have no clue about the realities of adoption.”

The open adoption choices Caldwell refers to are the opportunities that women have to customize their own adoption plan. “Nowadays they can choose the family for their child and even meet and speak with them. They can choose how things go at the hospital. And they can choose to have ongoing contact through email, letters, visits, SKYPE, texting… the possibilities are endless! The result is an adoption triad made up of the birth family, the adoptive family, and the child who are all connected for one purpose – the best interest of the child.”

Caldwell expects that President Obama will step forward to veto the ban if it passes the Senate, even though he has voted for similar bans when he was a senator. She remains hopeful, however, that somehow open adoption will enter the debate.

“You only have to look at the abortion statistics and the number of families waiting to adopt in this country to see that if only a fraction of those women made different choices, it would make a difference to so many,” Caldwell says. “We’ve come so far in so many areas of women’s health, it saddens me as both an adoption professional and adoptive mother that we aren’t sharing the truth and possibilities about open adoption as a pregnancy option.”

While critics point to the number of children languishing in the foster care system, Caldwell sees that as yet another strong argument for her case.

“Had these parents had the option of adoption explained to them, many may have chosen it prior to the involvement of Child Protective Services. In fact, at Lifetime Adoption Center we receive many calls each month from women who have had children removed and are interested in making a permanent adoption plan for their children. However once the government is involved, mothers often have little say or ability to make these decisions,” she reports.

In an effort to provide accurate information on adoption choices that women have, Caldwell offers her book as a free download for anyone interested at

“I just want women to know and understand what adoption is and what it isn’t. It isn’t right for everyone,” she admits, “but just having the knowledge is a powerful step in ensuring the debate surrounding this issue takes adoption into account as a viable option for an unplanned pregnancy.”

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Birthmother’s Day – A Day of Honor and Healing

Many women frequently give of themselves for those that they love. One of the ultimate shows of true love is when a woman decides that her child may have a more secure life with another family and places that child for adoption.

Borne from that selfless act came Birthmother’s Day, a day set aside to honor these most special of mothers. Celebrated the Saturday before Mother’s Day, Birthmother’s Day is truly a day of honor and healing.

In 1990, a Seattle-based group of women felt that they deserved to recognize their adoption decision with dignity and resolve. As the world often passes judgment, not understanding the depths of their love, the founders of Birthmother’s Day realized that despite the inner struggle that they may feel because of their decisions, they must never underestimate their sacrifice.

If you are a Birthmother, you already know the emotional rollercoaster that comes with placing your child for adoption. Your feelings can range from the contented feeling of knowing that your child will be provided for as you desired, to the loneliness or doubt in yourself. Birthmother’s Day is a day to cope with these emotions while celebrating you and your sacrifice.

Here are a few ideas to commemorate the day whether it is for a special Birthmother you know or something you can do for yourself.
1. Buy a bouquet of roses or blooming plant.
2. Attend a Birthmother’s Day event in your community.
3. Organize a Birthmother’s Day where you show other Birthmother’s honor.
4. Share with someone special in your life the feelings surrounding adoption.
5. Write a letter, poem, or song dealing with your innermost feelings and the positive things that have come from your connection to adoption.
Take the time to remember these strong women on Birthmother’s Day. The choices they have made have touched many hearts for a lifetime.

A special note to all birthmothers:
"I will make you beautiful forever, a joy to all generations."-Isaiah 60:15

Do you know how beautiful you are? You're beautiful in your heart, in your soul, and in every sense of the word.You're beautiful through your ups and downs, your successes and disappointments, through every stage of your own amazing life journey.

You're beautiful because of who you are, and what you've done, and who you'll always be.

You're beautiful to us simply because you're you.

We celebrate YOU this Birth Mother's Day. We pray God is blessing your life richly.