Thursday, October 30, 2008

The Reality of the Date Rape Drug

The U.S. Census suggests that annually, there may be over thirty-two thousand victims of rape-related pregnancies among American women over the age of 18. The adult pregnancy rate associated with rape is estimated to be 4.7%.

Several college-aged women have reported waking up in frat houses or apartments with no clothing on; finding themselves in strange surroundings with unknown people, or having actually been sexually assaulted while under the influence of a date rape drug.

Rohypnol is becoming the drug of choice for would-be rapists. Most predators target unsuspecting victims by slipping these illicit drugs into beverages at parties, bars, nightclubs and dances. Rape drugs have the power to make one drink feel like six or more.

Laura, a sophomore from Florida, attended a private party off campus, recalls she was dancing when the perpetrator probably laced her beer. She only had one drink and started feeling kind of sick; then her memory became foggy. “I started feeling drowsy, really dizzy and confused about where I was. My roommate was going to come with me to the party but at the last minute she made other plans. I decided to go alone, which was my first mistake.”

Laura has no memory of what happened for the next eight hours. Laura woke up in a back room in the club with bruises on her thighs and half-naked. She suspected that someone may have had sex with her, but couldn’t remember who the person was or any other details. She was hung over for days afterward. Laura blocked the whole incident from her mind and allowed a numbness to take over. Her grades fell and she found her mind wandering in class. These reactions are not uncommon for women who have been raped, and can be used as a defense mechanism against being overwhelmed with feelings or losing control. Other women may become anxious or depressed.

In Laura’s case she discovered six weeks later she was pregnant. She dropped out of college to have the baby and chose to have him adopted by a childless couple through our adoption center.
“It was the only way I could make something good out of something so bad. I needed to do something positive and it wasn’t the child’s fault,” Laura said.

Laura recalls when she first found out, how angry and scared she was. “I wouldn’t have sex with a guy I didn’t know. I have always been so careful of what I do and who I date. I was just so mad at myself for not being more careful. I didn’t know if I had contracted a disease or HIV. It was very scary and embarrassing.”

Toni was a 19-year-old victim of a date rape drug in her freshman year in San Diego. During Spring Break she was assaulted at a party by a friend she met in a class and had known for almost a year. She kept saying, “I considered him one of my best friends. He acted like he would protect me. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it actually happened to me.

“My body was violated. My trust in him as a friend has been shaken and I feel betrayed...I kept saying to myself, ‘I know him, and he's not a terrible person - so it must have been something I said to him or something I did that got me into this mess.’ I don’t remember and I keep trying to remember what I did, or said - what happened that night- my own judgment has been compromised!

“I just couldn’t go through with an abortion after what happened. As hard as the pregnancy was for me, I have always believed there are no mistakes in life and that this baby didn’t cause this and should not be the one that suffers. I had done the suffering already; abortion wasn’t the answer to my problem. It took some time, but I chose a family that I knew would love this child no matter what. Even after all I had been through, something good came out of it. It was not what I dreamed of when starting college, but I have never regretted giving birth and giving her life. I still have trouble trusting people, but I am working on it.”

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Thursday, October 23, 2008

Pregnancy Resources

The best way to make an informed decision is to educate yourself with the facts. We will try to answer your questions and guide you to the right professionals.

There are many resources for you and help from qualified professionals to help you with your needs. All the websites listed below provide free support and assistance to pregnant women.

Other Informative Websites

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Facing an Unplanned Pregnancy? Chat Live

Are you facing an unplanned pregnancy? We can help you find solutions and honor your decisions for you and your child. You can reach a caring, professional coordinator any time or day of the week by calling toll free, 1-800-923-6784.

Or, you may choose to chat live with a coordinator. Visit to chat live now with a caring coordinator about your options.

You're not just a face in the crowd. You've found women you can trust with your needs and pregnancy concerns. Though we can't offer a "quick fix," you'll find incredible support, advice, and practical solutions for your pregnancy and family problems…and hope for a tomorrow with a plan.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

So I Was Thinking About Adoption...

Face it, you probably aren't here looking for fun and games.

You probably are looking for help... for someone to talk to... for info. The good news is that we've got that!

The book So I Was Thinking About Adoption...Considering your pregnancy choices has just been released. Click here to learn more about this book.

What people are saying about So I Was Thinking About Adoption...Considering your pregnancy choices:

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Single Parent Prison Sentence: Options for Your Child

When a parent goes to prison, it can affect a child forever.In manysituations, children are left home in a stressful environment or sent tofoster care.What can a family do if a parent is sent to prison? It is adifficult thing to have your family split apart in any situation, but thechallenges of prison and family life are very unique. What do you do if you are the only parent for your children and you are about to be sentenced to prison? There are options, which I will share with you.

Many families have a difficult time after a parent is sentenced to prison. The spouse or other parent is left at home and is now responsible for the entire house, including the bills and stress of raising the children as a single parent; this stress can be overwhelming. Some spouses are angry and often feel that their punishment is even worse than their partner who was sent to prison. At least in prison you get to have friends and interact with others, but left home alone you hardly have time to think. Some situations leave kids scattered between relatives, sleeping on the couch or in sleeping bags.

Keeping your children's relationship strong with the parent that was sent to prison will be hard. Children will often withdraw from that parent and not be interested in going to visit them.It is not because they don't love their parent, it is just because they can feel the tension around thesituation and want to do what they can to avoid feeling that way.

Besides being traumatized, it is difficult for children to understand and they often have to deal with extreme conditions at home. What happens if the parent going to prison is the only parent a child has? If a family member is not going to take custody of the children they will become a ward of the state.

Here is what a number of single parents have chosen to do:

If you are a single parent facing a prison term, you can consider open adoption as an option. Through adoption, you can choose loving adoptive parents for your child. You get to decide where they will go and who will parent them, since you will be unable to. You can keep the children together and still stay in contact with them. It is traumatic enough for a child to have a parent go to prison, but being moved from foster home tofoster home or separated from their siblings will make it even worse for the child.

Through open adoption, you can find a family to parent your child in a way that you would if you were there. You can work with the adoptive family and discuss what would make you comfortable in making your decision. If you are going to be in prison for a length of time, it could set your mind at ease knowing your children had a stable loving home to be raised in. Counselors can help explain adoption to you and your children when you are ready. There is no cost to you to go through an adoption plan. All the legal work is paid for by the adoptive parents and the choices are up to you if you decide before you check in for your term. There are a number of waiting families of all ethnic backgrounds and faiths to select from.

You can make a good choice for your child's future our help: